Recent discussion of intellectual capabilities among otherwise good to excellent filePro programmers

[Kenneth Brody]

Quoting Nancy Palmquist (Tue, 15 Mar 2005 09:49:23 -0500):

> Guys,
>
> This saber rattling has got to stop.  I am embarrassed to say that I am
> part of this community when I read the kind of back stabbing that has
> come to be "normal" on this list.
>
> I would suggest that each and every one of you that feels obligated to
> defend, insult or otherwise post personal comments about the members of
> this list - take a breath.  Back off and look at what you are posting.
> The need to respond to every posting as if it insulted you or one of
> your closest friends is not helpful.

If you feel someone has insulted you somehow, stop for a second and ask
yourself "are they really insulting me, or am I reading something into
the message that's not there?"  And if you still feel you're being
insulted/attacked, put the message aside, come back to it later, and
re-read it again.  Then, and only then, send a _private_ e-mail to the
sender and try to be civil when asking "why are you insulting me?"

> I find that the entertainment value of these postings is quickly fading
> to a point where I can no longer even read postings from some people.

If the message appears to me to be a flame, I simply stop reading it.  If
there was something useful further down, I'll never see it.  (And I'm sure
there are other who will never see it as well.)

> We are a small community and should try to spend more time building that
> community and its members instead of breaking it down.
>
> John made an attempt to post information that he felt would be useful to
> the community.  The thread continued to flow as a "my code is better
> than yours" until feelings were hurt and personal comments were made.
> This should have been an opportunity for all to benefit from a solution
> not a chance to determine who is better than who at coding.

Perhaps rather than taking a "my code is better than yours" stand, why not
take a "great idea, here's how I think it can be improved upon" stand?
And if someone's "improvement" won't work for your particular situation,
that's fine.  Just don't attack it as "wrong".

> I always learn from the postings offered to enhance the community, even
> if I choose to solve my problems differently.  We can all benefit when
> we have our horizons expanded with new approaches to problems we all
> face.
>
> I know I am a small bit of this list and my presence makes only a small
> ripple but I really hate this kind of interaction and environment and
> will soon find that it has become a waste of time to participate in any
> way.
>
> I call many on this list friends and hope that they will take this
> criticism in the way it was offered, but I expect more jabs and barbs
> will be sent as the bad behavior is defended or excused.
>
> Let us hope for better and try to build bridges where the gaps between
> us are large, instead of increasing those chasms.


--
KenBrody at BestWeb dot net        spamtrap: <g8ymh8uf001 at sneakemail.com>
http://www.hvcomputer.com
http://www.fileProPlus.com